Hello, my name is Jack Sparrow. I'm a 50 year old self-employed Pirate from the Caribbean. 
Everyone likes to make jokes about socks disappearing in the wash, but I posit that chip clips are even more likely to vanish without a trace. Seriously, I bought a pack of four of them just a couple of months ago, and they’re already all gone. This is not my fault! It’s the nature of chip clips!
